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10 ways to tell your parents you're pregnant!

How do I tell my mum and dad I am pregnant? Their little girl is going to qualify for an appearance on an MTV series called teen and pregnant? That is a shocker even for the coolest of parents, well unless you warned them ahead like say “hey mum I might be getting preggers in a few weeks” yeah -that doesn’t happen does It.? So how do you tell your parents you’re pregnant?

HOW TO PREPARE YOURSELF for THE TALK!

Before I give you some tips on telling your loved ones that you’re pregnant, I’d just like to say that whatever the reaction from your parents, friends, boyfriend, at the end of the day you need to be happy and comfortable with your own feelings and decisions about your pregnancy. Take time to think things through a little. Your parents or friends and boyfriend might have a lot of negative comments such as “your life is over”, “you will never be able to be an astronaut now” “how will you ever get a degree now?” blah blah blah! You need to be able to block out the negative comments, and the only way you can do this is if by  block  out your own negative thoughts and think about the wonderful things and the new perspectives that may arise from this; For example, “I am going to work harder to reach my aspirations” “I am going to be a MOTHER” “This baby does not stop me from achieving any of my dreams” (ok maybe except lazy days in bed and apparently it is socially unacceptable to turn up in a nightclub with a baby--oh well!).

So here are 10 ways to tell your loved ones the BIG NEWS!

  1. Find the right words: The first sentence is usually the hardest. You can say something along the lines of “Mum, dad. I have something to tell you. Please try to remain calm because is really hard for me too”. Allow your parents to take in what you said (even if it’s a week!)
  2. Pick the right time.  Being able to communicate with each other — especially when emotions are running high — is essential so pick the right time. It might be best to wait until they are in a relax mood to tell them.
  3. Open up & be honest about how you feel about your pregnancy. Share your fears and worries with them such as “I am scared of how this is going to affect my relationship with my friends, my education and my future as a whole” etc
  4. Put yourself in their shoes/be prepared for their reaction: Some parents feel a sense of guilt. They think they should’ve done more to protect you. It is up to you to reassure them by being mature and as open as possible to them.
  5. If your parents usually yell, then chances are you are familiar with this so try to remain calm and find ways to keep the conversation productive by resisting the urge to yell back. It may help to tell your parents that you understand their feelings and point of view.
  6. Remember that they love you. You will probably need your parents more than ever. Try to involve them as much as possible and ask for help when you need it.
  7. Give them time to get used to the idea!
  8. Let them support you when they are ready – don’t push them away if they genuinely want to help
  9. Let them know that you still want to carry on at school / achieve your goals / continue your career path etc and talk to them about your plans.
  10. Be realistic  - accept that it will be hard at times but let them know you are aware of this
  11. Listen to what they say. But know that ultimately the choice of what to do next, and the responsibility of being a parent, is yours…..

Even though a lot of girls say that their parents would kick them out if they got pregnant, the truth is that for many young mums, their parents are actually their greatest advocate and best source of support. It might take them a while to get used to the idea, and they may worry about what other people will say, but if they love you then they will only want the best for you, and it’s likely that they will in time get over the loss of their ‘little girl’ and welcome the capable mother, fabulous role model and determined young woman that you have become.

Good luck!!

REMEMBER!

EVERY SITUATION IS DIFFERENT

LOTS OF THINGS COULD AFFECT EACH PARENT’S REACTION. I MEAN C’MON IF YOU WERE LITERALLY SEEN AS A SAINT STILL WAITING FOR THE PRINCE CHARMING FOR YOUR FIRST KISS, YOUR PARENTS MIGHT BE IN TOTAL DISBELIEF AND EVEN IN DENIAL OR EXTREMELY IN SHOCK TO SAY THE LEAST. IT’S A SHOCK TO FIND OUT YOU’VE BEEN HAVING SEX IN THE FIRST PLACE! BUT REMAIN CALM AND UNDERSTANDING.

IT DEPENDS ON YOUR FAMILY VALUES AND VIEWS ON SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE, RELIGION, CULTURE ETC. SOME PARENTS EMBRACE IT AND DEAL WITH IT AND OTHERS MAY FEEL TOTALLY ASHAMED OF OTHER PEOPLE’S REACTIONS, ITS FINE.

THEIR FEELINGS TOWARDS YOUR PARTNER AND YOUR RELATIONSHIP. IF MUM AND DAD THINK YOUR PARTNER IS A JERK..PUT IT THIS WAY, THE FACT THAT HE HAS MADE YOU PREGNANT WON’T GO DOWN WELL WITH YOUR DAD ESPECIALLY. TALK TO YOU PARTNER ABOUT THIS FIRST IF POSSIBLE.

DEPENDS ON HOW OLD YOU ARE AND YOURS AND YOUR PARTNER LEVEL OF MATURITY.

Comments   

#1 Juvin 2014-12-30 18:27
Thanks for the advice.

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